The Belltower

So it's 2008 and technology has transformed our world.  We have built telescopes that take pictures of faraway stars and cars that can read our mind.  It's enough to make us feel pretty superior to our caveman ancestors as the Geico commercials can attest.  So why is it that the second we step in dog poop, our first reflex is to find a stick?  Maybe it's just me, but the exact nanosecond that my brain receives the message that my foot has exposed my shoe to unspeakable horrors, my eyes are feverishly scanning the horizon for a stick.  

I feel that I'm taking a bold step in bringing this issue to light.  Mainstream media refuses to address this phenomenon, and I'm sure it's not covered in school curricula.  I've heard that some people have eshewed the stick as a poop-removal device, using a water hose instead.  (Clucking my tongue...)  In a time when fresh water supplies are taxed by drought and increased demand, it is socially irresponsible to waste this precious commodity when sticks are readily available.  Besides, with the complexity of shoe tread at an all-time high, can anything really beat the stick when it comes to desullifying footwear?

Next time you step in it, put the hose down and remember this- sticks were good enough for our wooly fathers and by gum, they should be good enough for us.   

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